Humor: Missing socks

At some time it has probably happened to all of us. We'll be diligently sorting through our clean laundry only to find a couple of assorted socks are missing their partners. As we fold, we stand over the laundry puzzled in confusion knowing that the pair had gone into the wash together, but somehow got lost along their journey into the dryer.

The missing socks syndrome is an amazing phenomenon. Wash load after load socks go missing until we suddenly find there are dozens of socks missing their mates.

 

Have you seen my missing sock mate?

Some socks disappear permanently. 

But where do they go? Does the "wash monster" eat them for dinner? Did the socks run away? Maybe they are giving us payback because they don't like the way our feet smell? Perhaps it could simply be that our elusive socks are trying to send us a strong message they are unhappy with their current jobs and living arrangements and are demanding change?

Other socks return after a period of disappearance and come back acting as if nothing has happened. Hmmph. Did they simply become bored with their mundane lives and decide to play a game of peek-a-boo for a while to mix it up and make things a little more interesting? What nerve. Especially after we spend so much time worrying about them.

Maybe pairs of socks are like human couples; one storms off after a spat, only to suddenly emerge later to make up and be happily together again. It's also interesting to note those odd matched socks cling together in a pile, but refuse to interact with one another. Perhaps they are secretly wondering where their significant others have gone off to, or maybe it is the fact that many are hesitant to pair themselves with someone new and remain faithful to their missing soul-mate.

I can't help but wonder if those poor socks left behind are fret with anxiety over their missing mates, or if they are in on the game too and carefully guarding the secret of their partner's sneaky whereabouts?

If the abandoned socks are anything like my husband's, they stay alone in a drawer in wistful hope their sock partner returns. This drawer is a place where all the abandoned socks gather together and commiserate over their lost mates.

He also strongly feels that just because one sock is missing, they should never be discarded. His philosophy is that eventually a partner will show up or even if a sock isn't a perfect match, he hopes they'll eventually marry someone with different characteristics. He'll never abandon these socks and purchase new ones. Truly, it is sock loyalty at it's best.

Many socks do reappear over the course of time. Perhaps it is as simple as our missing socks simply love to play an old fashioned game of hide-and-go-seek to break up the routine.

Whatever the reason, we're typically disappointed when socks disappear forever, but happy for those times missing socks do actually return.

Where they go in the meantime though will likely always remain a mystery.

Humor: Do cats really care what you think?

Cats are funny creatures, and their crazy antics are so amusing. These four legged felines can be adorable, funny, affectionate and snobbish all wrapped up in one. It is amazing how these cute fuzzy kitties exhibit emotion. Ever notice how a cat's emotions can range dramatically? They can either turn their snooty nose up in disapproval and then suddenly release a loud purr of content. These furry felines can be loving, angry, timid and demanding all within a matter of minutes.

Growing up we always had cats in the home, and over the years it was fun to watch their fascinating behaviors. Turns out there is one behavior I never saw in a cat. Did you know they get embarrassed? I didn't.

Seriously, have you ever seen a cat illustrate any feeling of shame? I never have. Now dogs, on the other hand, show a pang of guilt if you let them know they've done wrong and will do most anything to get back in your good graces. But not cats. No, they typically remain steadfast in their determination and never show an ounce of humility, guilt or embarrassment.

In my experience, cats are typically above all that nonsense. Obtaining validation and approval typically bores them and they are pretty much oblivious to any havoc they may have caused. Have you ever seen a cat act apologetic? They traditionally do as they please and make no regrets for it.

There are a number of stray cats frequent a family member's house and there have been six long-time mealtime visitors at the stoop each day. However, recently two new additions have been moseying on in during the dinner hour to join in on the dinner fun. The two new critters were unknown to my family member and their background history was mysterious. But she happily feeds them too; offering them food with a little nudge of affection behind the ears and a pat on the head.

A while back my family member went away for a few days and asked a neighbor to come and feed her own indoor cat and to put some food outside for the strays. And sure enough, when he arrived, he happened to notice a few cats hanging around looking a bit hungry. Of course they were. But what the cats hadn't realized was their usual chef and server was out of town.

As customary, there are the "regulars" who arrive to chow down. The cats are all impatiently waiting as Mr. Good Neighbor diligently gives each one a scoop of food and the ceremonial pat on the head. Then, per the recent custom, the two latecomers arrive for their portion of the feast.

As Mr. Good Neighbor goes on down the line, he eventually gets to the late arrivals. They both look up at Mr. Good Neighbor and stop dead in their tracks. If a cat's jaw could drop, it would have struck the ground in shock. Mr. Good Neighbor saw the stunned look on the two kitty faces as his own jaw dropped in astonishment.

If you're like most of us you've probably never seen a cat embarrassed, but these two cats were so mortified at the site of Mr. Good Neighbor they bolted off the deck and into parts unknown. Stray cats aren't usually ones embarrassed to beg and you may be wondering what in the world caused these two to jet off without so much as even a nibble . . .

You see, as the good-natured Mr. Neighbor bent over to offer the two last kitties a place in the buffet line, he realized these were his own two cats who he had fed back at home not less than an hour before.

The two partners in crime never returned during the days my family member was out of town and Mr. Good Neighbor was serving up the meals. Instead they scoped out the joint and returned a day or two after they realized the normal chef had returned to put out the buffet. At this time, the two cats resumed their new routine and arrived fashionably late for dinner.

So, the moral of this story is that while cats may be stuck-up and loving, some do also have a level of mortification. It seems some cats ain't too proud to beg -- but they are embarrassed when they're caught.